More tranny stories later!
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
He has no idea I'm scrolling through Instagram while he's going down on me. I'm so bored.
Randomize
