i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're making bets on your personal life
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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