I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
