She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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