not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
Randomize
