Texts From Last Night

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  (407): View more from Florida

  tod's in jail

  (863): View more from Florida

  he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am.

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  (407): tod's in jail (863): he was afraid of holiday checkpoints so we let him ride my mom's tandem bike home. by himself. at 4 am. http://tfl.nu/355g
  Replies (11) Good night (2554) Bad night (833)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.

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  (716): I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk. http://tfl.nu/wlu8
  Replies (103) Good night (3126) Bad night (12330)
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  (315): View more from New York

  mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?

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  (315): mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!? http://tfl.nu/d0je
  Replies (6) Good night (915) Bad night (2689)
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  (709): View more from Newfndlnd, Labradr

  i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.

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  (709): i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk. http://tfl.nu/5r6v
  Replies (4) Good night (2657) Bad night (1040)
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  (516): View more from New York

  So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence

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  (516): So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence http://tfl.nu/140k
  Replies (6) Good night (1486) Bad night (974)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school

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  (912): It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school http://tfl.nu/xr6r
  Replies (9) Good night (870) Bad night (1863)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later

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  (732): Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later http://tfl.nu/qouw
  Replies (4) Good night (932) Bad night (864)
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  (513): View more from Ohio

  i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution

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  (513): i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution http://tfl.nu/2azu
  Replies (3) Good night (1136) Bad night (604)
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  (603): View more from New Hampshire

  the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read

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  (603): the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read http://tfl.nu/k8on
  Replies (1) Good night (1227) Bad night (455)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.

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  (443): I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again. http://tfl.nu/sx09
  Replies (1) Good night (607) Bad night (340)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"

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  (717): This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick" http://tfl.nu/axax
  Replies (2) Good night (603) Bad night (282)
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  (720): View more from Colorado

  Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.

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  (720): Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage. http://tfl.nu/0rvw
  Replies (1) Good night (299) Bad night (563)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.

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  (832): I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too. http://tfl.nu/amfi
  Replies (7) Good night (936) Bad night (299)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.

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  (773): Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there. http://tfl.nu/z9zi
  Replies (3) Good night (376) Bad night (530)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right

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  (+44): Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right http://tfl.nu/y3am
  Replies (2) Good night (304) Bad night (219)

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