I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
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I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
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Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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