Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm currently eating a turkey dinner, listening to xplosive by dr. Dre, and drinking rum. Hispanic christmas dinners are the best.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was saying things like "cum for me like a good girl" and "put my entire python I like to call a dick in your mouth" .. Okay I might have changed that one a bit
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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