you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
