I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Mom got drunk as hell, crashed Dad's wedding and some how left with the best man. This is why you should be glad you aren't my sibling.
Randomize
