ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
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