look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
