This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
this beer tastes like vomit already
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
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