What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
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