I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I just convinced a telemarketer I live in a tree.
What did he say?
He still asked if I want a home security system.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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