super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.
And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Randomize
