The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I just realized that I have to choose between a future orthopedic surgeon and a dude currently in jail. My life is so fucked.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
