i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
