Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Randomize
