Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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