erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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