I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
