He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
