Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
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i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
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I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
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