I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
Beautiful wedding. Beautiful bride. I got shitfaced. Came home and ate two corndogs. I'm still single.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
My dick has a subreddit
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.