Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I'm so bummed I missed coconut bowling. It's fucking cold here and no coconuts to be found
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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