I hate all girls vehemently.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
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