Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
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