forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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