he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Those nachos came to me in a dream
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
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