Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
