we made out on top of his cat.
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
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