I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
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