wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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