A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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