i barfeds in our rink
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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