I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
