Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
