Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
I love when Facebook suggests people I may know. Well, yeah, I know him. He's my drug dealer. Pretty sure I want to keep that relationship strictly professional.
Randomize
