no, he came in my armpit
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I wear drunk well.
Randomize
