I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
my poor anus
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Randomize
