Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
Randomize
