evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
She looks like a beluga.
I want to splash her with water and when she screams say "I didn't want you to die. You looked parched"
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
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