she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Randomize
