Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
My CPA just snapchatted me a picture of her playing beer pong at a picnic. Time to do my own taxes?
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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