so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
Just puked most of my soul out..
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