Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
If this outfit doesn't get me pregnant tonight I don't know what will...
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
