highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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