Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
on the brightside, the semester can only get better from getting a dui at 8 am on the first day.
your optimism is becoming unhealthy
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
We were walking home from Pluckers (read carrying your drunk ass) and out of nowhere you yelled "Say bitch you got a Facebook?" at a random chick walking by.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Randomize
