I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Favorite thing said to me in 2012: It's like you have two tongues!
Were you keeping a list?
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
I'm really busy with my period
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