it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Randomize
