Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
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